Putting your phone on speaker and holding it while driving

Dear southern California drivers:
Why do you think it's OK to hold your phone near your head while it's on speaker? Do you think that's what the hands free law means? Do you think it's better to do that than just holding it to your ear? Well, it isn't. You're holding the phone, so it is not hands free, and I hope your distracted ass gets a ticket. Why don't you hang up and pay attention to the road? I don't want you to crash into me because you are too caught up in whatever you're talking about. Just shut up and watch the road.

Today, I learned what Santorum REALLY means.

It may be the name of a politician, but santorum also means something else! Isn't that fun?

Pasta with Spicy Cheesy Tomato Sauce

This is a basic tomato sauce pasta with a bit of spiciness in the sauce.

Ingredients:
1 jar of marinara sauce (we will upgrade this to something more awesome)
1/2 white or yellow onion
Garlic! I used about 8 cloves
1 jalapeno
Some red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon of butter
3/4 lb pasta (I used whole wheat penne)
Mozzarella Cheese

Broccoli Cheese Sandwich

Ingredients:

• 7 or so cloves of garlic
• 1/4 white onion
• 1/4 head of broccoli
• 3 white mushrooms
• 1 to 1.5 tablespoons of butter
• 2.5 slices of white cheddar cheese
• About the same amount of mozzarella cheese
• 4 slices of potato bread

The Quest

Sometimes, in the dark hours of night, I go forth into the vastness of the internet in search of others who have heard BOB's call to take up the holy spork. Here is a shining example of a man worthy of wielding the One True Utensil:

deathbyspork.com/

Now go forth, and seek out our brethren! Find the best spork related websites! Dig them out from obscurity, and let them shine! Gather a list of those great works that pay proper tribute and honor to BOB's gift to humanity, the spork!

Mars Rover Simulation Video

Mars Rover Article with Video

Scroll to the bottom of the article for the video. It shows the launch from Earth orbit to Mars, the atmospheric entry, parachute, and rocket crane landing. Then it shows what the rover can do.

If you aren't fascinated by this sort of thing, then you are visiting the wrong web page.

Rover on the way to Mars!

NASA
LA Times Story

Curiosity is on the way! Now we just have to wait until August.

ZOMBIES!

http://runforyourlives.com/

This is a 5k race and obstacle course where participants are chased by ZOMBIES! This is an important training opportunity. BOB will need spork wielders to serve him after the zombie apocalypse, so you must learn how to survive.

Spork.org

spork.org

I'm very pleased to see an ancient website like this still up. The last update was apparently in 1996. Glorious!

Favorite web comics

xkcd
Wondermark
Penny Arcade
Schlock Mercenary
The Order of the Stick

Forgotten Wisdom

I had a thought today. One which I considered worthy of recording upon this testament to the glory of the spork. I nearly wrote it down at the time, but I did not. I thought I would remember. But alas, that thought escapes me, and thus you are deprived of that pearl of wisdom I had summoned up from the depths of my mind.

Don't worry, though. It was probably just some stupid crap. However, I am annoyed to have forgotten it nonetheless.

Bdarpn, the content-less word.

I've heard it said that more of what we mean when we speak is conveyed by tone than by the literal meaning of the words we say. People will say "okay" or "fine" to mean many different things, and we must consider tone and context provide differentiation of meaning.

So, why not have a word that has no meaning by itself at all? In this way, we can actively inform the listener not to mind the literal meaning of the word, for there is none.

Well, now there is such a word, and it is bdarpn. It is pronounced, "bid darr pen".

You Shouldn't Hate People for Silly Reasons

BOB generally likes people who are different from him, as long as they don't eat with spoons.